To the 30 year old Brittany

8.26.2011

Hi,

Youre getting older now. And I thought it might be nice to write you, so that someday when you look back on this goofy blog you'll see that I was thinking of you, even now as a 22 year old. And as you read that line you'll think "wow, i knew so little" Thats probably very true. But I'd like to remind you, when you're 42 you'll think that your 30 year old self was very young as well, so...lets just say we'll always feel like we're little in comparison to when we're not so little.

I'm writing you to remind you. I sometimes get worried about you.  Not that you're not a big girl (I mean you're even bigger than me) but the world isn't so kind to women like you. At least it isn't to women like me, so I'm guessing it won't be to you. Women who have chosen not so traditional career paths or to embrace a body that isn't necessarily the norm (unless the norm changes in the next 8 years.) Or to choose to serve your husband rather than pursuing your dreams above everything else. So, I wanted to remind you a few things, so that you can find joy even now and rest assured that you are doing better than fine. You're remarkably doing well..

The 22 year old self approves of you. You're a good mom. If you can't grow babies in your own belly, then I know you'll be a good mom to someone who needed a mom. If you end up being a stay-at home-mom for a while-Please. Don't let society take your joy. You should shine.

Please Shine.

You're in charge of the next generation. Any random job you have (unless its working with those wee minds-like being a teacher,) really wont matter compared to that. And any job you want will be there when its time for that change. Remember when Dad said "once you start working you'll never stop." ? Well its true. It'll be there for you. And all those dreams you have about P.H.D. and all that, It'll happen. A lot of people give up what they really want, for what they want now. Don't let that be true for you. Time is on  your side.

And about your looks. If you have stretch marks, be proud. You've grown a whole human life. And if you are living healthy, then please say "screw you" to any BMI or any other thing that would tell you you aren't enough...or 'too much' (but otherwise, don't say screw-your kids might repeat it.)  Please, Don't become those crazy women that get sassy about skinny. You know what I'm talking about. God created us different. I hope you're confident enough to celebrate their bodies too. and their career choices. and their life goals. I hope you're actually confident in all that God has for you so you can encourage others even when they're on a totally different track then you. and even if they dont support what youre doing.
If you actually read that last part and think "wow, I'm actually doing that." My heart will swell. I would be so proud of you for that.

Thats my only requirement for you. That you're confident enough to celebrate.

And another thing, I've been thinking a lot about this. We grew to know that the world is a liar. For instance.
#1: If you get money, you'll be happy. Lie.
 #2. If you just had a husband, then you'd finally have it all! Ben and you both know this is a big lie. Luckily you knew that before marriage.
#3. Approval from others is what will finally make you feel accepted. False. It doesn't work does it? Because there's always other people to find approval from. It never ends.
#4 You can be happy without a Savior. Ha.
#5. Career over family pays off. Joke. You retire, then no one is around to have fun with. and money runs away quicker than you can catch it

You get the point.

so why do you think that the worlds definition of Beauty is actually accurate?
They lied about everything else, except this one they got right? Bunch. A. Bologne.

I hope you still say boloney when youre 30. and I hope by the time your 30 you dig the (probably very different than your 22 year old) body God gave you and have finally quit allowing the world to make you feel anything less than God-Made.

All that to say, embrace your 30 year old self.
 I bet you finally have laugh lines (the ones you would try to make in the mirror) And you probably have a well-used stomach with all that laughing I hope you're doing (and hopefully, all that good eating). I hope you realize you're strong-for loving a man through life's storms and for raising a baby or two or for just going through whatever God gives to you. Babies or not, You have done well..

I'm proud of you. I think you should be proud of what the Lord has done these past 8 years too.

Yeah. I think that's it. Dye your hair a crazy color. and remember: Celebrate.

See you in a few,
Brittany

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